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Desires.html
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<!DOCTYPE html>
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<meta property='og:title' content="Sexual attraction, desire, lust, love relationships, marriage and divorce from a Christian perspective" />
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<title>Sexual attraction, desire, lust, love relationships, marriage and divorce from a Christian perspective</title>
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<p><author>Oleksandr Zhabenko</author> 🇬🇧<br>
<h2>
Sexual attraction, desire, lust, love relationships, marriage and divorce from a Christian perspective
</h2>
<p>Recently, I had a lively discussion on this important topic. Some
participants welcomed the main thesis, while others raised various
possible objections or questions. I decided to create a free-form piece,
presenting the ideas I presented in the form in which they were first
published - in Dutch - with the help of a translator and a little bit of
editing.</p>
<p>The text is disordered and unsystematic, but the meaning is still
quite clear behind the not quite clear structure.</p>
<p>I think that if an unmarried boy and girl are a couple, their strong
sexual desire comes from a certain deficiency. Ideally, their
relationship should be so rich and fulfilling without sex that it
shouldn’t cause strong desires that are hard to resist. The situation was
similar in Paradise.</p>
<p>Not generally strong desires, but actually strong sexual desires.</p>
<p>I believe in God the Creator. The theory of macroevolution has
significant drawbacks, the main one being the lack of ‘intermediate
links’. I’m not against sex, but it has a certain purpose, meaning,
properties, and so on, which I wrote about. If you are interested, I can
give you links to my works in which I write about my beliefs in English
and Ukrainian.</p>
<p>But humans are different from all other creations of God, especially
in their spiritual and physical nature, their image of God, and so on.
Therefore, it makes no sense to consider a person to be one of the
animals…..</p>
<p>In animals, sexual activities are mainly, if not exclusively, about
procreation and have little to do with human freedom. But human
relationships, and especially those with God, are quite different.</p>
<p>Some people think that marriage has no impact on people, especially
on the biological level.</p>
<p>Some people tend to reduce one thing to another.
In particular, they can say that sexual desire is purely biological,
that it is associated with animals, and marriage, on the other hand, to a
purely social phenomenon that binds people to each other and to some
animals. This is called 'reduction'. But external similarities are not enough for such a
classification. Do you think that human sexual desire and behaviour is
not significantly different from that of animals?</p>
<p>From the Christian point of view, it is wrong to completely ‘divide’
a person into different dimensions, to try to consider them separately.
A person is a holistic being. And this is what makes them different from
animals.</p>
<p>Divorce exists to prevent a clear, evident evil. Divorce has no other
purpose, and so it is much better if it is not necessary.</p>
<p>God created humans, animals, angels, etc., so this does not mean that
‘God has nothing to do with sex.’ ….. God has blessed people to be
fruitful and multiply in marriage. The Son of God, that is, God, became
human and even went through situations in which people tend to think
about sex. But He did not have lust, let alone sex (He did not need
them, and yet He is the mysterious Bridegroom of the Church). On the
contrary, strong sexual desire is synonymous with lust. And the Bible is
the Word, the Revelation of God, and it speaks a lot about these
issues.</p>
<p>If a person feels sexual attraction, if they are attracted with love
to sexuality, then they have the ability to have sexual drive. This is
one thing, and it is really quite natural, just as the opposite state is
natural. Both states are very natural. But if a person has a
strong sexual desire, lust, then this is a completely different state. And it
has its own peculiarities.</p>
<p>The main feature of lust is that it is not completely free, and
therefore not sufficiently controlled. Free,
desirable, and consensual sex and forced, unfree sex are not the
same thing. The latter can even be a crime, such as rape. Thus, lust has
a certain unfreedom in it, it is ‘a movement that takes place in a
person beyond their freedom’.</p>
<p>Lust is like the desire to sleep, eat and drink. We have to eat,
drink, etc., we have these desires regardless of our freedom. Marriage
creates a relationship in which we can say that the freedom of one
person is in the other. See in particular my poem:<br>
<a class="links2" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/C6izPylsnYr/">https://www.instagram.com/p/C6izPylsnYr/</a>
</p>
<p>See more about what has just been said:<br>
<a class="links2" href="https://oleksandr-zhabenko.github.io/en/Cup.html">https://oleksandr-zhabenko.github.io/en/Cup.html</a>
<br>
I would also say that
we are talking about natural marriage, but in a sacramental church
marriage, God gives direct gracious help in this too.</p>
<p>Yes, we can say that lust outside of marriage comes from a certain
deficiency. In the simplest, most general sense, it is a deficiency of
the ‘other person’ and the level of satisfaction in the relationship,
and most importantly, a deficiency of the ‘ holisticity of the sexual
desire’ in that person.</p>
<p>I’m probably not expressing myself in the best way, I’m sorry, I need
to comprehend things that are not well comprehended.</p>
<p>
Source of the original post where I wrote my comments:<br>
<a class="links2" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/C7ZUysVNhTK">https://www.instagram.com/p/C7ZUysVNhTK</a></p>
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